Friday, September 4, 2009

No Excuse

This week has been one of the fastest weeks of the summer. I can hardly believe that Friday has already arrived. I am nervous yet anxious for Saturday morning to come simply because that is when I will be loading up the car and heading down to London, Ontario. I have spent a lot of time just thinking about what it's going to be like, and yet I know I won't know until I get there. It seems like I sit there in bed just thinking of how I am going to handle moving away and dealing with diabetes in a different environment such as college.

I won't hide the fact that I have been very upset these past couple days. I have been tossing and turning in bed not able to sleep because I just can't wrap my head around this huge change that I am about to make. I feel like this is the time for me to become my own person. To prove not only to myself but to everyone else that I can do this.

Dealing with diabetes this past week has been stressful. I have been having lows for no reason at all. I feel as if I am doing it to myself just through the stress that I put on myself. I am getting tension in my back as well as under my eyes and I have even felt sick to my stomach. I realize that it may seem as if I am over reacting about the whole situation but trying to handle not only the adjustment of living in a new place but also the adjustment of living with diabetes is extremely hard for me.

It now has not been quite six months since being diagnosed and yet there are days that I feel like I have had this forever and days where I feel like I was just released from the hospital. I feel like with each day that comes I am fighting a battle, it just never goes away.

With school I want to make sure that I keep all aspects in my life in check. I want to keep in mind why I am there, what I want to do and how I am going to work my way through the obstacles that school may bring. Diabetes isn't an excuse to not do something, fail something or give up.


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