Thursday, May 21, 2009

A Promise

I promised myself one thing after being diagnosed and that was that I wouldn't let myself fall. I made the commitment that I wanted to be the healthiest I have ever been and that nothing was going to stand in the way of my dreams and goals. I think this should be a promise that we all make to ourselves.

I never realized how 'big' of a deal diabetes was. I remember sitting on the hospital bed in the emergency room laughing, making jokes and just complaining that I wanted to leave. I didn't think that being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes was going to change my life or make me any different than I was before March 13
th. Obviously I was uneducated about the disease and therefore treated it as if I had a common cold or minor headache. It wasn't until about the second day in my hospital bed that I really thought to myself, "this is serious." I had nurses coming in and out checking my blood sugars, taking my temperature and making sure I felt o.k. I would get up walk around, look out the window from the 8th floor and think, how did I get here?

You can't prepare yourself for what's to come. As much as we try and organize our lives and set goals there is always going to be something thrown at you that you will have to learn how to handle on the spot. I had to learn. I read books, papers,
pamphlets, magazines but truly nothing taught me more than the experiences that I went through being in the hospital and then coming home.

I learned that life is very precious and nothing can be planned. You can't predict what is to come, and what would be the fun of that anyway? I learned that I am stronger and better than I ever thought I was and that nothing and no one can slow me down, break me down or pull me apart. I am the closest friend, enemy and guardian of myself and I am the one that will determine just how far I will go.

I promised myself that I wouldn't let myself fall and here I am today, standing tall.


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