Early this morning I went through the scariest moment thus far since being diagnosed. The scary part is that we don't even know if it is diabetes related and if so we are unsure of how it does relate. This morning at 3:00 a.m I woke up feeling a little strange. It wasn't that I felt faint, sick or confused I just felt strange. I thought it was probably a good idea to check my sugar, I can recall waking up a couple times prior to this and being too lazy to go downstairs and check. Finally I got up and headed downstairs, I went slow, put on my glasses and made sure I didn't fall down the thirteen stairs in the dark. I headed for the kitchen and checked my sugar which was 5.4. A blood glucose level of 5.4 is normal but I knew that I just didn't feel that great so I decided I'd have a snack.
I opened the cupboards and fridge but just couldn't decide on what I wanted until I suddenly felt like I truly needed something. I quickly hurried over to the basket of fruit beside the kitchen sink. I reached but knew I just couldn't grab the banana. I collapsed on the kitchen counter gripping as hard as I could to keep myself up. I felt faint, dizzy and beyond scared. I shouted for my mom and dad, I just needed help. They rushed down and I think that they were just as scared as I was.
I barely remember how it all came about. I know that my dad was holding me so that I wouldn't hit the ground. I know my mom got a chair for me and I sat down but my dad still had to hold me up. They asked me questions, and I don't know what I said back. I know that all I could see was white. I didn't have my glasses on anymore but still everything was white. I recall seeing the bottle of honey, but my mom fed my dex4 (sugar tablets.) I know that I was shaking inside, sweating and just feeling like I had absolutely lost control of my body.
My sugar was fine, and after an hour my sugar was at 8.8. So what could this be? Apparently it could be many different things. Yesterday I started on Euro-Fer which is an iron supplement since we found out that my iron is extremely low. Could my iron be too low at this point?
There really are so many questions that I've been asking myself today. This morning didn't even seem real, it all seemed like a strange dream that I'd never want to relive. It truly made me realize that this could happen again, and I could be alone. I am not going to hide that I am scared. You can be strong, but you can be scared. I know that I am a strong woman and that I can get through times when life knocks me off my feet but I also know that this isn't a walk in the park and it's going to take courage, strength and endless amount of patience.
Diabetes is such a serious disease. I think that no matter what, people don't realize how serious this disease is until they are touched with it. I just want to stress that it isn't easy and it's not always fun but I really try my best and make the most out of it.