Tuesday, August 30, 2016

A Low in the Night

Imagine you're lying in bed. You've been asleep for a couple hours and you suddenly wake up. You feel strange, but you aren't sure why. You lay there in agony thinking "what time is it?" You glance over at your phone and check the time, and huff and mumble about only have a few hours left before the alarm rings. You try to go back to sleep but, you feel hungry. You feel beyond hungry as if you could clear out a variety store in half a second. But, you try to ignore that feeling. You have been doing so well with clean eating, why destroy it now? You try to close your eyes and ignore it but, your mind begins to talk to you. "Get up, check your blood sugar. You're low." You try and ignore it and think of all the reasons why you aren't low. "I was 12 mmol/L before bed."  "I ate a snack before bed." "I'm sure it's just hunger not a low..." But, there comes a point where your mind is literally screaming at you. So, you give in. You find your glasses, pull the covers off yourself and walk down the stairs to the kitchen. The whole time thinking, "please don't eat too much. Just take what you need and go back to bed."  You reach the kitchen and realize it would be much easier to keep things closer to the bedroom but, you can't remember it all. You check and you're low. You think what you want, but, know that you're wasting precious sleep time. You grab a few things, still reminding yourself, "take what you need and go."    You stumble back upstairs disrupting your partner who is also trying to sleep before the alarm goes off. You lay there, still feeling low but, know that you've ate enough. You ate more than enough. You toss and turn and try to quiet your mind and still your body. You fall back asleep, hoping a low doesn't visit again.


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