Saturday, March 14, 2020

Shifting my Perspective

I must admit I didn’t realize the impact this COVID-19 was going to have on this world and by world I mean literally every thing from travel plans (our Disney trip...) to groceries, right down to general human contact.  I was at Shoppers Drugmart earlier in the week to get a few things and didn’t stock pile on anything like toilet paper or snacks (okay, I did buy some Cadbury eggs, but they’re long gone).  I didn’t think about getting more insulin or juice boxes and maybe I should have? I don’t know. 

I don’t usually get anxious about this type of stuff. By “this type of stuff” I mean things that may greatly effect my diabetes.  I don’t know why I’m not a worry wart about it because I literally worry about EVERYTHING else but I guess that’s how I keep my cool about living with type 1 diabetes.  

When people say “compromised immune systems” I literally don’t think about myself in that group even though technically I am.  I am “the people” that are at risk I guess, and with everything slowly shutting down maybe I need to sprinkle a little worry into myself so that I am prepared as a type 1 to hunker down. 

Yesterday I looked into our pantry after hearing and seeing the lines that were pouring out of our local places like Costco and Walmart. We have pasta, we have rice, but my stash of fruit snacks for low blood sugars is getting low. Wait, I may need those. I do need those.   Of course I have run low on low supplies before, but it wasn’t a worry about whether or not I’d be able to get more.  I’m sure all the mamas are loading up on fruit snacks along with the toilet paper, so will fruit snacks be hard to find soon too?  Who knows. 

The next thing I did was look in the fridge to see how much insulin I had left. A few vials and because of the restrictions on how many vials insurance will cover during a certain period (I called) I cannot stock up.  So there was another little moment of, “oh sh*t”.      

It’s not really bothering me that I am “at risk” because with type 1 diabetes I am on the top of many lists, but what began to worry me was would I have enough supplies if things were to shut down, or become sparse.  

We often ‘joke’ about if diabetics would survive the apocalypse, after all we are so dependent on our supplies and medications and while this isn’t an apocalypse, it really shifted my mind into a place I’ve never actually felt.   A place where I truly realized my dependence on things despite always feeling at ease.  

I know access to these things like insulin and food has been something I have taken for granted when for many people around the world this is their everyday reality despite what’s happening in the world.  It has given me an opportunity to step back and realize how fortunate I am. 

Hopefully in this chaotic time we can also take time to appreciate all that we have and know that nothing is guaranteed.  Whenever the hysteria settles, I’ll be thinking of my health in a different light.  

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