Friday, September 27, 2019

I Know That Worry

I know that worry.  I know that worry of carrying a baby while managing type 1 diabetes. I know that worry that you’re going to do something wrong and that the whole weight of the pregnancy (not just literal weight) but emotional weight is on your shoulders and only yours because you’re the one with type 1 diabetes, and you’re the one carrying that special baby. 

I know that feeling that you’re not checking enough, you’re not eating healthy enough, you haven’t cut back on carbs, you aren’t working out enough (or at all). I know that feeling. 

I worried while I was pregnant - I’m sure many do. But I worried that because I have type 1 diabetes, I had less of a chance of having a “perfect” baby, less of a chance of being a healthy pregnant woman and a glowing mother.  I know that worry.
Photo by Erin Girard

If you google type 1 diabetes and pregnancy a bunch of worry clouds the screen.  Articles about risks, complications and stories that will make you worry more than what drove you to google in the first place.  If you join a type 1 diabetes community page about pregnancy, you’ll encounter even more worry - other type 1s typing out their worries - I don’t blame them because we all feel that way. (Tip: leave the groups, and find a few key type 1s to confide in!) 

But, even though I know that worry (I won’t tell you not to worry) I will say that it’s all worth the hard work you’re putting in whether it levels up to other expectant mothers / mothers or not.  Because you worry, you care and that’s the best comment I ever received and I now pass it on to you. 

Almost 9 months of worry and my beautiful baby is here and now I worry about other things (of course!) but I worry because I care. 


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